All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize
