plz talk dirty to me
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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