omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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