What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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