2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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