I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
