I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
