Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Randomize