I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
