it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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