I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
