At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Randomize
