Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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