Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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