She said her name was "party"
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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