Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
