He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
is wine microwaveable?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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