come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize