Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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