That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
