I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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