You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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