You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize