if i can run in heels then i can drive
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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