I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just want to make out with him forever
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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