I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
they need to just BURY HIM!
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize