Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
