i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
