i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize