do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
