Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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