So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
