Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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