was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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