i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Say something about gay babies.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
