I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
