we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
PANTIES FOUND
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