lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
