he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
