Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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