but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
