Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You need Xanax blowdarts
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
