I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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