my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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