Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
