I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
