I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
