have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
