I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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