it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
