Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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