Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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